Category: A look back at how I became me.

Hyde Park

I recently had an appointment with a client in Hyde Park. This is a neighborhood surrounding the University of Ilinois Hospital and known for its divisity.
My parents were born in this neighborhood over 75 years ago. They met and dated at the local social club.
Growing up my siblings and I were treated to many stories of their youthful adventures . I just had to imagine the two people I knew as Mom and Dad jumping off the rocks to swim, attending the social clubs and “hanging out” in the neighborhood
It wasnt until this last trip to this neighborhood that I realized that I TOO was born in Hyde Park. Gosh why did it take me do long to include myself in that rowdy bunch.

I was a little overcome with emotion  while driving around the neighborhood. Trying to locate from memory where things were. I did get to see St Thomas the Apostle church and school where my Dad made his first communion, Ray grammer school where I attended kindergarten and I really enjoyed the blocks and blocks of tall apartment buildings. I could close my eyes and remember the summer sounds while our windows were open to get some freedom from the heat. I relived the smell of the carpeted hallways and all the different smells slipping under each apartment door reminding me that other cultures share similar spaces.

I could not remember our address exactly and of course many buildings were replaced with more modern buildings chain stores or parking lots .

i just felt closer to my parents than I had for a while. If it’s possible I would not be surprised if their ghosts are haunting their old familiar places!
My Mom had such fond memories of Hyde Park and talked of them right up until her last days.

Why this ..why now?

So it seems that I have been thinking about writing for a long time, and the encouragement of my oldest Daughter has brought me to this space. I want to leave some of my life stories for my family and friends so they can better understand me. The decisions I continue to make, my crazy outlook, why I laugh when most would cry.

I think I’ll start with the most shameful part of my story, well at least it was till I recognized and owned it.

I am a person who has a few very good, long time trusted friends.
This honor of friendship is usually easy ,after all during a persons school years, sports activities and parties, neighbors etc, you make many friends. For me and my siblings, it was not so easy. My parents were 18 years older than I. For many reasons which I’ll go into later, we moved once, twice sometimes three times a year, So me, the eldest child of Thomas O’Connor and Wanda Woods O’Connor attended more than 16 schools by eighth grade. No I was not an Army brat, nor were we traveling around the US but rather neighborhoods in Illinois and Indiana.

At one point I could name in order each school, and probably with some help could list them on my blog. Who knows someone may read it and say ” Hey I remember that girl”.

I was the perpetual “New Girl”. I did not have girlfriends, shopping dates, sleep overs or invitations to attend birthday parties. I was the one sitting alone, working alone, quiet and very private.

I remember how mortified I was when in Eighth grade, a lady from Public Aide came into my classroom with a box of clothes for me and my siblings. Talk about wanting to sink into the floor! I remember that parents were not eager for their children to play with me or invite me, understandable because they did not know me or my parents. In fact in 8th grade, the only year I went an entire year to the same school (Nathan Hale on Melvina) I lived on 64th and Kedzie. I walked 4 miles to school. Sometimes, when it was very cold, I took the bus  . the cost at that time was  12cents. That same  12 cents was sometimes used to buy a piece of italian bread soaked in gravy. The place on the corner near my grammar school of 63 Melvina was a family owned fast food restaurant. They gave me the bread for 5 cents. I was happy to have it. I still like meatless soaked Italian bread.

I must tell you that during this whole time I was happy, because I was in the same school, this was brand new to me. Even though I did not live in the neighborhood I could pretend that I was just like everyone else.

So I am not complaining as they say “you don’t know what you don’t know” but in fact this situation led to one of my best skills. I learned and still have an ability to sum up the personality and trustworthiness of  a person pretty accurately and fairly quickly. I had to learn this skill to survive my earliest school years.Thats another story .

Truth or Dare